Dross and Baubles!

This week, as it’s Christmas, Whovian Leap is talking baubles…

At this time of year “dross and baubles” might sound like an alternative to “Bah, humbug!” but you would be very much mistaken. It is actually a line from the opening scene of Douglas Adams fan favourite “The Pirate Planet”.

Baubles, tinsel and all things festive have over the last ten years decked the halls of Nu-Who in the seasonal shape of Christmas Specials. Some fans have even commented that the Capitol itself looks like one big Christmas bauble. 

When it comes to spheres, Classic Who has had its fair share – just think Yeti, Nestene, Sontaran or even Professor Chronotis. But as Christmas is almost upon us, our search is a little more shiny. What of baubles past?

The Captain is somewhat unimpressed with Mr Fibuli’s mining report and shouts “Dross and baubles! We must find Visilium. We must find Madranite 1-5!” And who would dare to argue with that?


In “The Invasion of Time” Andred encourages the Doctor’s tribal companion to find some suitably regal attire for her visit to Gallifrey. She is not impressed with any of the outfits that her future suitor offers, tosses them to the floor and tells him “Keep your fine clothes and your useless baubles!” 
While in “Mawdryn Undead” the Brigadier isn’t too enamoured with the idea of entering the malevolent Mawdryn’s capsule and tells him straight, “Look, if you think I am entrusting myself to this bauble…” And who can blame him?

How can we forget “Timelash” (many fans are often heard to say this) H.G. Wells asks the Sixth Doctor, “How are these baubles and crystal balls going to help us?” to which our colourfully dressed hero replies in typically friendly fashion, “You’ll see!”


What better way to conclude than with loveable conman Glitz? The Master is attempting to hypnotise the rogue in “The Trial of a Timelord”.

“Are you listening, Sabalom Glitz?” he purrs. 

“Not really. I was just wondering how many grotzits this little bauble cost you!”


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